I heard this a few weeks ago, from a coach on YouTube.
The video was talking about relationships, friends, family… with a special focus on partners.
What he was pointing out is a technique used in boxing, 5+5=10 means that per every action a player makes the adversary should react with the same intensity, not more, not less.
And it made me think how simple yet right was this principle.
Specially when it comes to love relationships, we tend to idealize the other person, if we think we are in love of course.
We create a whole imaginary that often doesn’t correspond to reality. We excuse any inappropriate word, action or even worse! If we have a clear action that reflects our interest toward the other person and we get ignored, we even excuse them, making up some sort of fantastic situation to still hold to the expectations.
But as the coach said, facts are facts and 5+5=10 and never ever 11.
This for me, recently, was a reality check. It gave awareness and understanding of a situation I have carried for too long. And what is most important above all, is to realize what lies behind platonic love or unhealthy relationships… fear…
Yes, the fear to empower yourself. To know that you deserve the best and to allow this to enter in your life.
Many times it is better to hold to something we already know is not going to end up right because that way we have an excuse, we can play the victim.
Truth is, to be in partnership takes guts.
It is not easy to allow someone else to be part of your life, specially when you have built a balanced and safe relationship with yourself.
But living without love is living just by pieces, creating illusions of small boxes called career, friends, travel, fun…
Don’t get me wrong, I truly believe that the most important relationship is the one you build with yourself, but sharing your self love with someone that reciprocates is one of the real meanings of life.
We attract what we think we are, if you believe you are not enough, you will attract people that treat you as not enough, simple. Again… 5+5=10.
Gain clarity in this, be honest with yourself and allow to receive and deserve what you are, full of worth and nothing less.